What makes holidays sad?
It's Mother's Day and we're supposed to be happy, but it doesn't always work that way.
This realization became evident to me when I was a young girl. In our yard we had several varieties of roses in all colors. We always pinned them on our dresses for church. Those whose mothers were living were supposed to wear red ones. Those whose mothers were deceased wore white ones.
The year after my grandmother died, I remember going out and selecting the roses. Our red ones were small, but the white rose blooms we had were huge and impressive. The one we found for Mother that year was the most beautiful I had ever seen. I still remember the bittersweet expression on her face.
On holidays the memories of the times when we were all together can overwhelm us. The personnel at our gatherings changes. Some of us have no one. We tend to romanticize the past times -- to see them through rose-tinted lenses. Our minds tell us the good old days were better than they could have possibly been.
As much as possible, it's best to look for ways to make each holiday special within the context of the joys we have today. It's time to make some new happy memories.
I have published a new Kindle book entitled "I'm Choking But Life Moves On Along the Path of Grief." It is under review and is scheduled to appear in Kindle today. The purpose of this book is to help us deal with grief.