John's Potato Salad

Boil, cool, and peel:
6 eggs

Boil or slow cook. Cool. Peel if you like. Cut into cubes:
5 pounds russet potatoes

Mix together: (Use mortar and pestle if you wish.) 
Black pepper to taste
Cayenne pepper
About 1 teaspoon ground paprika
About 1 teaspoon Mrs. Dash Southwest Chipotle
About 2 teaspoons Goya Adobo All Purpose Seasoning (This is salty. You won't need extra salt.)
1-2 teaspoons sugar (no more!)
Add this as you wish. You may want to use some of it as a garnish.

Chop or slice. Mix:
A bunch of green onions including tops
4 celery ribs
1 green bell pepper
1 small purple onion
Fresh cilantro as desired
Fresh parsley as desired
1/2 cup pimiento-stuffed olives (Slice in half. Don't substitute ripe olives.)
1/2 cup bread and butter pickle slices
Add all these ingredients to the potatoes except celery.

Add as you stir:
1/4 cup dill pickle juice
As much Hellman's mayonnaise as you need
Mustard as desired

Finish by adding the eggs and celery.  Don't stir it too much after you add the eggs.

Cover and chill.